I Accept Manory’s Plategate Resolution, Under Two Conditions…

Plategate resurfaced yesterday after Taylor’s cheap-shot article reminded Manory’s that they have a bone to pick with me, the technical winner of their ice cream eating competition. During my pursuit to victory in their no-rules competition, I accidentally smashed their plate on the floor.

I apologized for it and donated a few Jackson’s to the fundraiser that night. I thought amends were made, but Manory’s had other ideas…

First of all, very flattered to be called a local celebrity, add that to my LinkedIn. Second, the only reason Natty Kratty isn’t laughing is because she knows damn well when I come through and pump out bloody’s in a way that Manory’s hasn’t seen before, she might be out of a job.

Before I could accept or deny this proposition, Manory’s came through with a couples extra clauses:

Damn. The fact they support Taylor for her below-the-belt blog makes me question Manory’s in its entirety. Do I want Taylor there during my redemption shift after she made fun of my body type, and said I don’t deserve to eat ice cream anymore despite the fact I’m an amateur ice cream reviewer? Do I want to work at an establishment that supports such a hostile environment? What will their HR department make of this? Regardless, I still think it’s an appropriate offer and I accept it, under two conditions:

  1. I want the whole squad drinking bottomless mimosas while I work. I’m happy to put on for my team but Taylor deserves no special treatment for this whatsoever.
  2. I need Natty Kratty to wear a Two Buttons Deep shirt for the entirety of my shift. She can hate me, but if she’s not down with going a few buttons deep on the job, then that is no job I would ever want to have. Even just for a sole Sunday morning in October…

Manory’s, the ball is on your plate.




  1. We Will Break The Record For The Most Mimosas Made In A Morning At Manory’s on Sunday, November 10 | Two Buttons Deep - […] competition. One thing lead to another and I had the  Manory’s management calling for me to make things right…

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