Clarification: Taylor Will Be Jumping Into The Hudson Off A Dock, NOT The Booze Cruise

Last week Taylor made the deathwish commitment to jump into the beloved Hudson River if and when our booze cruise sells out before October 11th. (BUY TICKETS NOW)

Now, for those saying “what is the big deal about jumping into the Hudson River,” you clearly live above exit 14. Anybody beneath you knows damn well the prominent river is dwelled with decades of discharge, both chemically from GE, and naturally from the humans of bordering cities, among other culprits. It’s still a beautiful river to booze cruise on, don’t get me wrong, but it will be quite the feat to see our fashionista Taylor embrace water that could very well leave her with an extra extremity at this point.

We just need to make something clear, as it clearly was not clear to our friends at the Dutch Apple Cruise, who are hosting the booze cruise:

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We’re on the same page, Dutch Apple. Taylor will not be jumping off of the cruise ship or your dock, why? Because that would ruin her hair and outfit. Could you imagine our fashionista saying bon voyage to an outfit she has been planning since September the night of the big event? You think she’s the kind of girl that would be happy hopping back on board soaking wet, throwing on a large 2BD shirt from our inventory and her hair in a scrunchie? You don’t know Taylor…

I know Taylor, and I know she’s still good for this promise IF we sell out. But we will film it prior to the event at an undisclosed location closer to Troy. I can guarantee you Taylor will be high and dry for the main event, with her hair done to the nines alongside her killer outfit, even with updated modifications for her new extremity.

BUY TICKETS TO HELP TAYLOR GET A NEW EXTREMITY

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  1. (Almost) Everybody Had A Great Time At The 2BD Fall Booze Cruise | Two Buttons Deep - […] fact we did not sell out. We were about 30 tickets short of that benchmark, thus pushing Taylor to…

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