Australian Athletes to be Given Super Condom to Combat Zika

Well…. No they aren’t… or well… sort of? Maybe? They kind of might be getting condoms that could potentially stop them from acquiring Zika during their intercourse filled escapades in Rio de Janeiro this summer. If you’re not aware, the Olympics, and the Olympic Village specifically more or less turn Olympic athletes into rabbits in heat.

Initially you’d think, “Hey, why can’t some of the world’s fittest people just keep it in their pants for a few weeks to avoid contracting a dangerous disease tied to birth defects and wait resume their copious amounts of sex when they return home?” Look at the words “world’s” and “fittest,” and now put them together. When you pluck every person from around the world who looks like they were chiseled from marble and throw them into a glorified college campus, good luck getting them to resist jumping each other’s bones.

So, basically sex amongst athletes at the Olympics is a foregone conclusion, even with a mosquito disease at the forefront of every major news outlet. Here’s where Ansell and their “Starpharma’s VivaGel lubricant” come in. These particular condoms can supposedly protect against “bad vaginal bacteria (gross), some STDs, and now Zika.”

Which is totally awesome for all the beautiful people that are going to get to spend a month or so playing games and bumping uglies… except for the little problem that this special lubricant hasn’t exactly been confirmed to do anything, as Starpharma’s own website states that it has ”not yet applied for or received regulatory certification regarding Zika virus activity of VivaGel.”

With that said, I’m firmly in the camp that if you want to do something, you’re going to do it anyway even if the consequences are bad. So, might as well have a condom company telling you that their product makes it OK, even if they’re doing it with a wink.

Original Story via CNN.com

Side Note: The Center of Disease Control (CDC) stated that the only way for certain not to get Zika is to not have sex (there needs to be an option 2 discovered with great haste I would think) and if you do have sex of ANY SORT to wear a condom from “start to finish”. Oh yeah and breaking news, that “any sort” includes oral aka if this whole Zika thing doesn’t get sorted blowjobs will cease to exist (and there will be tons of birth defects ravaging our youth, but one thing at a time).

Previous

Next

%d bloggers like this: