PLOT TWIST: Thomas Rhett’s ‘Marry Me’ Song is Actually Sad



I’m a big country music guy, probably because that’s all my grandfather listened to and I must’ve somehow inherited the gene. Back in the day we had George Strait, Garth Brooks, Brooks and Dunn, ya know –the classics. Now a days we have Luke Bryan, Dierks Bentley and my man Thomas Rhett –the new classics, probably.

The other night I finally had a second to do a thorough job cleaning up around the house. What is the first step of that process? Tossing on some solid jams. Strolled on to Youtube, clicked on some Dierks and let the good times roll. Music has a way to remind you of a certain person, place, smell, experience and can put you in a better mood.


At this point in the cleaning process, I’m about 75 percent done hanging up some clothes when Thomas Rhett’s ‘Marry Me’ comes on. I’ve heard this song on the radio from time to time and always enjoyed it, but for some reason this time I got really into it.

Not to go all soft, but I thought it was a pretty song. Nothing better than telling a story about marrying the love of your life, right? WRONG.

Two things:

#1: I normally have no idea what is being said throughout a song. In music, much like in life, I pinpoint keywords of a conversation or song and try to put a puzzle together. For some reason, I think it’s faster and there very might well be a laziness/I don’t care quality to this but I’ve been working on it. So for this song, essentially my brain was saying ‘Blah, Blah, Blah, she’s beautiful, Marry me.” Oh boy, that was wrong.

I’ll wear my black suit, black tie, hide out in the back
I’ll do a strong shot of whiskey straight out the flask
I’ll try to make it through without crying so nobody sees
Yeah, she wanna get married
But she don’t wanna marry me

#2: I think its incredibly important to watch music videos. Yeah, you can generate a general thought about a song, but watching the music videos gives you that little extra support that you need to understand the lyrics. For instance, this music video depicts a guy who is clearly heartbroken that the love of his life is getting married right in front his face. AKA, watching this video made me look up the lyrics and then come to the conclusion that I’m an idiot. Real sad stuff.

At the end of the day, shoutout to this music video because I would’ve thought this guy had it made instead of getting cucked. No longer will I be smiling whenever this song comes on, but instead I’ll be shaming myself for getting this all wrong. It’s like when you think you know someone and they turn out to be the complete opposite. It’s that, but instead of a human, it’s a song which makes you feel like an even bigger loser.

And, double shoutout to my aunt who says I look like Thomas Rhett and to my girlfriend who chimed in, “Yeah but with a pudgier face.” Who is feeling themselves? This guy right here.

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