Upstate’s Only Panda Express Closes Just Days After I Was Robbed In One

Sometimes the universe works in mysterious ways. 

(Table Hopping) The Panda Express in Latham, the Capital Region’s sole location of a 35-year-old, California-based fast-food chain with more than 2,000 restaurants in more than 10 countries, closed in the last few days. Readers reported seeing a sign in recent weeks announcing the closure, but I never was able to get anyone to confirm it.

I’ll confirm it, Steve. The Panda Express closed because only terrible things happen in their restaurant. I was robbed last week while patronizing one in New York City. Yeah their honey walnut shrimp is tasty as hell, but I know I could never step foot in one again, and I’m clearly not alone. I’ve been to McDonalds a MILLION times and never had a bad experience beyond seeing the butt cracks of one of the regulars.

Panda Express one time…chaos. 

And listen, I’ve got nothing bad to say about their honey walnut shrimp. In fact I would recommend it…if their chain wasn’t ridden with terrible people. I was robbed in front of 50 PEOPLE who didn’t even lift a chop stick to help and/or ask if I was okay. Their employee just stared at me after I walk of shamed back to my seat to finish my honey walnut shrimp. Not even a free scoop of honey walnut shrimp for my troubles! Just stared at me like me being robbed was some foreign concept they didn’t understand, much like the food they were serving. These types of people have no business being in Upstate New York and for that, I’m not surprised they closed down…You don’t have to go home Panda Express, but you can’t stay here. 

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1 Comment

  1. Dave

    I’ll bet you keep your wallet in your pocket from now on


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