5 Alternatives to Naming Pearl Street “Jonas Brothers Way”

The albanet was ablaze today after Albany County debuted their new sign renaming a portion of Pearl Street as “Jonas Brothers Way”

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(Amanda Fries / Times Union)

(Times Union) SMG Management, which manages the county-owned arena, was approached by the promoter to see what kind of big things the arena could do to promote ticket sales. One of the initiatives the tour is doing is getting localities to rename a street in tribute to the trio.

The boy band recently got back together for a world tour. The last time they performed in tour in Albany was in 2005, when they first formed the band. They also performed in 2008 with Miley Cyrus.

A lot of folks had a gag reflex to this (although I’d put money on the fact over 50% of said gaggers turn up the dial with their new hit “Sucker” comes on the radio) but it’s easy to understand why.

The Jonas Brother’s have stepped foot in the area twice as performers, and now they get this salutation? C’mon. That’s like me getting a street sign in Santa Barbara, California. I’ve been there twice, it would be a little weird if next time I booked an airbnb, Captain Jack Lane was being presented to a goggle of local reporters.

But first, every great initiative has a great why, so…why this?

“I got two daughters I’m trying to get in good with, is there another reason?” (Albany County Executive Dan) McCoy responded when asked why this band was getting a street renamed. “There’s been really great bands, but it’s just been the sensation online with the fans across this nation that are so excited the Jonas Brothers are back that we figured we’d do a little tribute for them.”

“A little tribute” is the banner you have on the side of Albany’s parking garage (also a first for the county.) “A little tribute” is renaming a Stewart’s ice cream flavor for your event, or cider belly making a special batch.

Renaming a portion of one of Albany’s most trafficked street is not a tribute, it’s a homage, an honor, a hoist above every other great name who has performed at the TU Center. People made that clear in response to the news, and we’re here to propose 5 better alternatives to renaming Pearl Street “Jonas Brothers Way.”

  1. Frank Sinatra My Way

How about the fact Frank Sinatra CHRISTENED this very same arena in 1990. That seals the deal for me.

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Not gonna lie, you could have told me Frank passed in 1960 and I probably would have believed you. But here he was was roaming the Capital just a few years before my feet hit the planet. This would be a great name to pay homage to a worthy figure of Albany entertainment history. Also, you see that rat pack table at that pizza shop near PSP?

I’m sure you do, even if you don’t remember it.

2. TouchDown Eddie Brown Lane

This is a no brainer from Tom Nardacci, a guy who knows a thing or two about Albany. Touchdown Brown is a legend, a legend who John caught up with at last year’s Albany Empire home opener in one of our best videos to date. Eddie currently has a banner hanging inside the TU, now I think it’s time to move it on outside (as long we’re ignoring his history off the field).

3. Ranger Danger Boulevard

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I’ll be honest, I didn’t know who Ranger Danger was until this nom. But I can tell you one thing, I’m sure glad I do now. It only took me a short trip down the rabbit hole to find out this dude is a Capital Region legend who was Two Buttons Deep before we were old enough to run Two Buttons Deep. For example:

4. Circle Jerk Circle

This is “a little tribute” to 2BD’s own John Longton, who also has a legitimate side hustle slinging quality beef jerky on the low. It’s called Circle Jerk, and you can buy it wherever you can find John Longton with it. I’m not gassing it when I say it’s quality either, it’s the best I’ve had. Not that I’ve been in pursuit of the best beef jerky around, but I’ve dabbled enough in the jerky game to claim that is worth its weight in beef.

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But John knows the deal, it probably is better in an alley. 

5. Two Buttons Deep Turnpike

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This is my personal nomination because it genuinely makes way more sense than Jonas Brother’s Way. First of all, 2BD is as Albany as it gets, we’re Troy but we’re also Albany, we’re all over the Capital. Aren’t we suppose to work on coming together as the Capital Region as opposed to representing our individual cities so we can be bigger than ourselves? Are we still doing that? Okay, good.

Two Buttons Deep Turnpike represents where we are, and more importantly it would also represent what people are doing on Pearl Street to begin with: going buttons deep.

This way, not only is the street paying homage to a grassroots company built to stay here in the Capital Region, it also serves as a precaution to motorists of the conditions the pedestrians are in after 5PM. We all know there’s a 90% chance someone is gonna be stumbling in the road leaving PSP, that’s now news. So now, when you drive down Pearl Street, you would expect something like that if it’s Two Buttons Deep Turnpike…If it’s Jonas Brother’s Way you’ll be so busy singing “Sucker” in your car that you could very well hit that same PSP stumbler, go to jail, and miss the Jonas Brother’s Concert.

Just a thought. 

 

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